Is language exchange right for you? It works best when the two people engaging in it have already reached a communicative level in their target languages. They can save money, learn, and help the other person out at the same time. What’s not to love right? Well, I guess it depends on where you are in your language journey. If one or both of you have not reached a communicative level it probably won’t work. There is a lot of learning that should proceed a language exchange.
Grade School
The early stages of learning a language require a lot of listening. Language learners need to absorb the sounds and natural flow of their target language. Part of their time should also be spent imitating people who speak it clearly and naturally. Don’t expect too much of yourself during these early stages just absorb it. Traditionally students from countries like Hong Kong and China stay in these early stages for a number of years. They usually learn target grammar items or vocabulary so that they can pass exams, but don’t necessarily spend time absorbing the sound or flow of the language. Many of these students get discouraged and don’t learn English well. Having said that the grammar and vocabulary that they study in grade school, can provide a foundation for them if they decide to learn English after high school.
Paid Tutors or Language Exchange Partners
Of course, English is easier to learn than Chinese or Cantonese. English has 26 letters to form words with. Chinese has thousands of characters. I think it is best for Westerners to spend time in formal classes or with paid language tutors before giving any thought to a language exchange. I have both participated in language exchanges and heard stories of Westerns doing language exchanges with Chinese people. Many times it works out better for Chinese people learning English than it does for Westerners learning Chinese as the Chinese have studied foundational elements of English for many years. They just need a refresher on what they were already exposed to and a chance to use it. Of course, there will be things that they need to learn from scratch also, but this is totally different from the foreigner who comes to China or Hong Kong to learn Mandarin or Cantonese for the first time. Westerners generally come with no background in Chinese. As China’s influence on the world increases, more and more schools are starting to offer Chinese language programs, so this is not always true.
Chinese Have an Advantage
Still, generally speaking, it is much easier for a Chinese person to string English words together to ask a foreigner questions in English than it is for a Western person to string Chinese words together and even be understood by a Chinese person. Remember Chinese is a tonal language. Foreigners often get their tones wrong and are not understood by the Chinese people. In addition, to that, foreigners don’t usually have Chinese characters to fall back on for assistance when their tones are off and the other person just doesn’t understand what it is they are trying to say. The hard truth is that there are no shortcuts. It just takes a lot of time, time that many Westerners are not willing to spend. This leaves the Westerners feeling frustrated as they are at a loss for how to express themselves in Chinese, while their Chinese language partner is usually able to express themselves in English. They are therefore in a position to make more gains from language exchange sessions.
Opposite Sex Attraction
The other day I was recommending a friend in the states steer clear of clear of choosing a young Chinese lady to be his tutor. I told him he would be better off choosing a guy or an older woman who was already married. When you work closely with someone of the opposite sex it is easy to develop feelings for each other. Anyway be careful of this area.
Paid Tutors
For many English students English is very theoretical because they don’t get to use it in their daily life. I have helped a number of adults who fit into this category with their English. They usually tell me that there English is terrible but for the most part it is not nearly as bad as they think it is. They just need the opportunity to try to express themselves verbally to another person. As to whether that other person should be a paid tutor or a language exchange partner, I think it is worth it to pay to get a tutor especially if you are a foreigner. If you are a Chinese person, you might be able to get good results from a language exchange. Still if you have the funds, I would recommend a tutor.
The Gift of Language
Language is a gift that parents, teachers, and loved ones bless us with. We study and practice on our own but it isn’t until we meet with a real live human being and engage in conversation that we get to taste of where we really are with our language. I know this from personal experience. I didn’t grow up in the Chinese school system. Instead, I studied Cantonese from almost any source I could get my hands on. When I first came to Hong Kong, there weren’t many textbooks out there for studying Cantonese. I took from a book here and a book there and a friend here and a friend there. It was a painfully slow process and there were and still are holes in my learning.
Growth
A few years ago, I found a tutor who retired from teaching at the Chinese University of HK for 26 years. She offered to teach me at a reduced rate, if I would come out to her village house in FanLing. I said yes. Ms. Chan helped me in a lot of ways, but among the most important were that she listened to me and allowed me the opportunity to listen to her. My listening comprehension and my ability to express myself both improved. It took time to develop competence and confidence. I am still developing them. I am on a language journey and if you have read this far, I am guessing that you are to. We don’t arrive at our destination overnight, but with time and the help of language partners we can grow.
