Hong Kong inherited a lot from the British, for example, their love for the rule of law and their love for the English language both stem from the British. Hong Kong’s location made it a perfect hub for international trade. Westerners wanted goods from China, but they couldn’t speak Chinese. Hong Kong people provided a go between. Business flourished here and many people came here to make money. Unfortunately, due to COVID-19 and political conditions the mood has changed. Many people are immigrating to other countries and taking up jobs there. Hong Kong’s population increased by an average of 53,000 new residents every year between 2015 and 2019, but according to Hong Kong’s Immigration Department, that same number of people left Hong Kong in just the first 2 weeks of March 2022. It’s both ex-pats and Hongkongers who are leaving and those who choose to stay feel the weight of watching their friends immigrate. It’s hard to accept the things you can’t change.
Admiring Hong Kong People
So far my wife and I have decided to stay. Yes, economically it is good for us to stay and there are still many opportunities here. I have read several comments from those who have left saying that they feel sad to leave but that Hong Kong is no longer the city they remember. For years now, I have been inspired by the character traits of Hong Kong people. Sure the United States (home) has people of character also, but Hongkongers share a common culture that gives them a special strength and they are unique. We ought not to give up on them.
Bearing with Hong Kong People
Sometimes they can be a bit over the top. This drive to get ahead becomes ingrained from a very early age. It seems ridiculous to think that a 2-year-old would already be developing their CV or taking steps to get into the right school. Moms and Dads push their kids hard here. Here’s an RTHK video that shares one couple’s experience helping their little girl prepare for her interview. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=h9vQcTpRnZA There isn’t much time for them to rest and many times this pressure cooker mentality follows them throughout their life.
Pressure Cooker Mentality
When I first came to Hong Kong, I noticed the priority that people place on education. I thought what’s not to like about love for education? Smart well educated people generally do better in life, right? Yes, however at the same time, there’s a price to be paid, when a society sacrifices everything on the altar of education and success. I think as a foreigner, I thought this is their choice. It won’t affect me. Now I realize that everyone is affected by the deeply held values a society holds. It’s not that education or success is wrong. It’s our obsession with them that at times keeps us from being able to value each other as human beings. We were made for unconditional love and acceptance that can only be granted in the context of relationships. When education and success come first all other values take a back seat. We have to accept that this something we can’t change about the culture. At the same time we should also take steps to protect ourselves from it.
Loneliness
No wonder loneliness is such a problem in Hong Kong. People work long, hard hours. They give their job their best. There is a reward that comes from doing meaningful work well, but as meaningful as that is, it cannot take the place of time spent in relationships with people. Helen Keller said blindness separates people from things; deafness separates people from people. Of course, not speaking the local language fluently is different than deafness, but when it comes to understanding other people, it has the same effect. Local people are talking, but as a foreigner most of the time you aren’t able to understand. You are in effect separated from them.
Rocket Fuel For Your Kite
I’m thankful for Jody Costa’s book, Rocket Fuel For Your Kite, in which she shares her experience with hearing loss. I can’t imagine being a mom of 3 kids and losing my hearing. It had to be extremely difficult. Jodie says, “Hearing people have commented that total silence would be a dream. In concept, silence is peaceful and free, but that isn’t the reality when it is your life sentence. I’ve compared hearing loss to watching a movie through a peephole. No matter how hard you try you’ll never see the whole picture as it’s happening.” I can relate to this. I’ve tried desperately to understand what is going on around me in the staff-room at school, but I only manage to understand a little bit. Maybe this is similar to how someone might only see a few scenes while looking through a peephole. I also know what it is like to feel left out, isolated, and alone. I can’t help but wondering if other NET teachers feel the same way.
Dealing with Separation Caused by the Language
At times, I can totally relate to watching people interact, laugh, cry, and tell stories all the while only understanding 2 out of 100 words. Not all NET teachers are equally poor in their ability to understand. Some have better language skills than others and some can read body language and facial expressions and guess pretty accurately what is happening. Personally, I understand a much higher percentage of the words spoken during the morning assembly or announcements than I do staff-room conversation.
Choosing to be Isolated
I also have my favourite speakers and my least favourite speakers to listen to. As you can imagine not everyone responds equally well to these challenges. Some become bitter. One Sunday several years ago at church, I met a NET teacher who pretty much told me he hates Cantonese. He wears headphones and listens to music in his staff-room to avoid hearing Cantonese. I sensed lots of pain in his words. It was as if he was telling me that the local teachers had rejected him and as a result, he was rejecting them right back by wearing headphones in their presences.
Hope for a Better Tomorrow
The good news about not understanding a language is it doesn’t have to remain a lifelong condition. As foreigners, it is important for us to accept the things that we can’t change, while at the same time change the things that we can. We can learn the languages. We don’t have to remain outsiders. Admittedly, progress is usually slow, but when progress comes celebrate it and know that you are loved. Don’t give up. Years ago, I decided to learn Cantonese largely for my relationship with my wife. She told me not to and tried hard to discourage me from studying Cantonese, but I didn’t give up. Now we spend a significant amount of time communicating with one another in Cantonese. I love it. I consider it a milestone in my development. I hope that you also will taste the fruit of your hard work.
